You may never read this letter, but these are the kindest words I have ever said to you.
You're emotionally abusive and manipulative. You hurt me deeply and you knew it, even though you always denied any any wrongdoing. You sold me a dream, but you failed to mention that I would never be a part of it. You used me so badly that I almost can't believe it actually happened. You gave me nothing.
You positioned yourself so carefully by making sure you never quite lied or told me an untruth. You had an answer for everything, and on the rare occasion that you didn't, you never quite gave an answer. In this way you were able to walk away from this feeling as though you were good to me. But your behavior and manipulation is reprehensible. Even when we parted ways last, you just said, "Goodnight," expecting me to text you in a week and stroke your ego again and prove how much I like you. All those times it was over, you denied me simple closure. You couldn't even give me that, and of course I came back to try and make it right. Well, this is my closure.
Despite all of this, I remained by your side. I believed in you, and I saw great things in you. I believed your behavior was coming from a place of hurt and pain. The things that happened to you in your past affected you so deeply, and I kept thinking that if I showed you enough kindness, you would come around. I saw so much potential in you. But at the crux of it, you don't think anyone can truly love you for who you are, and so you value people by what you can get out of them. You give as little as possible so that when things fall apart, you never have to feel rejected. You throw yourself into material things that make you feel good for a little while because those things will never dump you. You are living a self-fulfilling prophecy. No one will truly love you like this. I thought I was in love with you, but in reality, I was in love with the man you could be - not the man you think you are.
That being said, I still believe in you. I know how much potential you have. One day I truly hope you will become the man I know you can be, but I will not be waiting around for that.
You and I will always be unfinished business. There will never be true closure. There are things left unsaid and undone, but they will always be that way. There are certain people who come into your life and leave a mark. You left me with a bruise of longing. Hearing your name will always pull at my heart, but letting you burn me has taught me more lessons than I could express in words. Unfortunately I was never able to make you reciprocate my feelings, but that's okay now because it's over.
This is the kindest letter I could send you because it's a truth that you need to hear. This is my closure. I am completing the unfinished business I have now so that I am free as I move into this next phase of my life unencumbered. I hope you grow up someday.
Best Wishes,
The Girl Who Never Left
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